Post-Marathon (Looking Back to Move Forward) Part 1

It has been a (very) long while since I have sat down to write and publish a new blog post.  Too long. I will freely admit I let life run its course, and while I did sit down a few times to recap my marathon and recovery, life kept calling on me to be present.  Here is a recap of my first marathon:

Leading up to the big day, September 12, my body was ready to taper.  While my training was solid and I consistently hit my paces and mileage, my last tempo run was a complete bust.  I went out too fast on a late August afternoon that was one of the hottest and most humid I’d trained in yet.  The next morning, I greeted the sunrise halfway through my recovery miles I had to get in early now that the new school year was gearing up.  I was left feeling that perhaps I couldn’t do it...that I couldn’t BQ at my first marathon...that I was too tired and there was no way to redeem myself from that last major training run.  

Miles & Smiles...that's how to race!

Trying to shake the self-doubt away, I focused on tapering well.  It was the last step in my training; the work had been done.  I did everything I could to rest my legs: no heels; sitting often; stretching and yoga; extra naps. Balancing work and running was easier than I expected as I could channel my extra jitters/energy into preparing my classroom for my incoming students.  After 18 weeks of training, I was ready to be done.  

Race day approached.  I never really talked about my goal to qualify for Boston beyond my closest running friends and some members of my running groups.  I never put it out there publicly nor did I chronicle my training paces...because I was paranoid I would jinx myself.  Leading up to my marathon, the Last Chance to BQ.2, I barely acknowledged my hope to BQ despite the fact I had trained for it.  My boyfriend Steve had faith in me, and so did my friends and running buddies.  For me, it remained to be seen.  I had faith in my training to get me through 26.2 miles and across the finish line.  For a first marathon, a Boston Qualification was a very lofty goal.  Finishing the marathon would be the end punctuation, where a BQ would be the exclamation point to finish months of intense training and sacrifice.

Steve ran with me for most of the last half.

The morning of September 12th came and I was as ready as I could have been.  My fueling plan was all laid out, tested and true.  Race outfit had been picked well in advance (I had raced in it all summer).  My GPS watch was charged and my race bag packed.  Steve and I left for Millennium Park in Grand Rapids after our traditional pre-race breakfast of coffee, peanut butter toast, and a banana.  We were greeted by a few of our runner friends who had come to cheer for me.  Then the race started.

Team Hansen

Everything was going well...very well.  I started out a bit too fast but settled in after a few miles.  The weather was perfect: cool temps and clear skies.  I stuck to my fueling plan, taking a Huma gel every 30 minutes, and taking a few sips of water every mile.  Steve began to run with me right around the halfway point, and I was glad to have his company.  There was a mild hiccup somewhere in the middle, around mile 14.  My sole sisters, Liz, Donna, and Amanda, popped up at an aid station with an epic cheering section, my son included.  Having them cheering for me and seeing my son stirred up tears and I lost my breathe for a few minutes.  It was all I could to to power up a small hill just after passing them, so I could slow down a bit to regain my race composure.  

My little guy crossing the finish line with me. 

Things were going smoothly until my GPS watch lost satellite signal right around mile 16.  It was still keeping time, but it no longer calculated my mile splits or pace.  I was a bit shaken and really pissed.  Ultimately, I ran the next few miles too fast, wasting precious energy.  I hit the wall at mile 22 or 23.  The last gel was taken and I powered through, although I did slow down, even walking a few times, trying to reset my mental game.  Finally turning right and heading down the home stretch, I focused on the finish line.  Steve veered off just before the finish shoot, letting me bring it in on my own.  My son, Cole, was waiting for me just before the finish line, and we crossed over it together, hand in hand.  My time: 3:30:49.  I had qualified for Boston!

Post race celebration: Crack Fries & a brew.

Liz, Amanda, Donna, & I post marathon.

Trica, my virtual training partner & friend.

Upcoming blog post: Post-Marathon (Looking Back to Move Forward) Part 2 - Things I Learned from Marathon Training.

Tick Tock Tick: Time to Get to Fixing

Time...a measure of duration and intervals...an ordering of events, past, present, and future…  As a runner, the value of this abstract measure is priceless.  Speedwork, training, tempos, personal records, pace, time goals, finding the space in my hectic life to dedicate to a long or short run...the list goes on and on.  But ‘time’ by itself is only the measure I allow it to be and I’ve been letting it get away from me.

As Lauren Fleshman said, “Time fixes nothing. Time is a facilitator but you still have to do the fixing; Dig into the difficult conversations; Look hard at yourself in the mirror and ask if you’re doing everything you can do to get healthy. If you aren’t currently living the life you want, there is no other way to get there. Time won’t make it happen. So you can either adjust the goal, or give yourself a swift kick in the ass. Those are your only two options unless you enjoy the feeling of eternal tug of war.” (see more on her latest blog post here.)  

It seemed as if Lauren Fleshman had been hanging out in my brain these last few weeks...because this was basically what I have been telling myself!  

2014 was a year of many ups and downs, as well as a heck of a lot of growth.  The weeks following Christmas and New Years are typically times of reflection and contemplation.  I don’t make resolutions...that just doesn’t work for me.  I prefer to look back at my actions and reactions, seeing what worked and what didn’t, then readjust for the future.  (Ironically, most of my reflections occur while I’m running.)

In 2014, I had set two major goals for myself: 1) run four half marathons and 2) run 1000 miles.  And I did both.  I trained hard and raced even harder, sometimes pushing too hard and ending up with mild injuries.  Overall, my training worked for me: running three to four times a week with a mix of long runs, tempo runs, and speed work.  My speed, pace, and running form improved from the beginning of the year, and I set new personal records for my 5K, 10K, and half marathon times.   

My race schedule...not so much.  Three half marathons and a 25K in eleven weeks left me ready for a break from long distances.  Add in a hefty handful of 5Ks and a few 10Ks, and my weekends were consumed with running all summer long.  Autumn came out of nowhere, leading me back to my classroom with no sign of my racing or hectic schedule letting up (and squeezing in one more half marathon the weekend of my brother’s wedding).  Stresses and pressures accumulated and weighed me down, pushing me off balance.  I reacted by pushing back...and pushing myself even harder.  So I have ended 2014 with a nasty case of shin splints and the realization that I need to get down to ‘fixing.’

 

Fixing My Race Schedule:

Celebrating all 1000 miles of 2014

I am promising myself to limit the number of ‘big races’ I do this year.  I have my sights set on two races: the Fifth Third River Bank Run 25K and my first marathon.  There are time goals I have in mind for both of these races...realistic but lofty.  I am still going to race local 5Ks and 10Ks, only being more selective about them.  If I’m feeling good, perhaps I will snag a last minute bib in a few half marathons as training runs.  As much as I love racing, I don’t want to overload my weekends with races like I did last year...it wasn’t fair for me to monopolize so much of the summer weekends with races.

Training Smarter, Not Harder:

Cross training is a weak point in my training.  Until recently, Pilates had been my only form of cross training (other than shoveling all last winter!).  My mission is to incorporate more stretching, strength training, and cycling into my training along with my Pilates.  A lovely fellow Oiselle runner gave me a Believe training journal and a pair of wings.  What I love the most about my training journal is that it has reflection and accountability built into it.  

As far as running, I am incredibly fortunate several veteran runners are helping me with my training schedule for my marathon.  I also have found a few running partners whose pace and running philosophy match mine.  My support system, the web of my running family, is extending, reweaving, and coming back stronger than ever.  

Time to Get to Fixing!

Now...time is needed.  Not to sit and wait.  Not to allow others to do the work for me.  Not simply wish my dreams and goals come true.  Now is the time for action.  Time for ME to get to ‘fixing’ and make this happen for me.  

And I can’t wait to get started...